Future Husband, Age Is Just A Number

Dear Future Husband,
I was talking to a girl the other day, and she said something. And I think you’ll appreciate it. If not now, definitely in about 15-20 years.

We were talking about clothes (and NO, I do NOT expect you to appreciate that). I mentioned to her that the last time I purchased a *puffy vest* was right before I began my freshman year of college.

*Definition of a puffy vest: A stylish feather-filled (usually down) vest that serves absolutely NO purpose as, when worn in cold temperatures, leaves one’s arms FREEZING and when worn in moderately cool temperatures, makes one’s midsection SWEAT LIKE HECK. But hey, they’re super cute, and I wear ‘em…or the single one I own…anyway.

I realized in that moment how many years had passed since my puffy vest purchase and said aloud, “Oh my goodness…freshman year of college was almost 15 years ago!”

She looked at me for a moment and responded with, “Woah. I totally thought we were the same age.”

So, OF COURSE, I asked her how old she was.

Get ready…

She said, “I’m 18.”

Then it was MY turn to say, “WOAH…” Followed by, “Bless you dear child.” Emphasis on child.

“Nope. I’m definitely NOT 18.” Maybe 18…PLUS 13. Ok, I’m EXACTLY 18 plus 13.

But, my dear Future Husband, here is why you’ll appreciate this: Your future wife will always look young.

I’m going to take this as truth and put it out there (and hopefully not jinx myself in the process)…when I’m 50, I’ll prob pass for 38. And I’m ok with that.

PS. If you look mature for your age, it’ll appear as though you scored a much younger woman.

Ima Waitin

Future Husband, Age Is Just A Number

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