Future Husband, It Got Weird

Dear Future Husband,
I went on a first date this weekend. Don’t worry, I know for a FACT it wasn’t with you.

It got reeeaaal weird. Dude smelled my hair. Twice. He also felt my arm muscle (or lack thereof) for ZERO apparent reason. Then he told me that for us to enter into any kind of relationship, I would have to agree to bear his children (adoption was not an option) and that we would be naming our first daughter Delilah. I prayed with everything in me that he wasn’t expecting to procreate on the first date…

And, can you believe we were out for hours in the middle of the day and he didn’t even suggest getting a snack, drink OR bottled water, much less lunch?! He did get parched, but you better believe we passed up 15 restaurants in search of – get this – a water fountain. No luck. He went thirsty, and I went starving (and slightly terrified).

PS. Please wait until at least the 3rd date to smell me.
PSS. Delilah is officially OFF the baby name list.

Xoxo,
Ima Waitin

Advertisements
Future Husband, It Got Weird

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s